Dog feeding time:
Odin: I’m going to give the dogs a boutique!
Me: Really?
Tasslen: No Odin, a boutique is a bunch of flowers. You want to give them a “parfait!”
Glad they are working on their French
#Tasslenisms #Odinisms
scroll down for more quotes by my daughter and son, from roughly April 2015 – July 20, 2017
see also Tasslenisms One ♥ Tasslenisms Two ♥ Tasslenisms Three
Discussion with my girl: So, it’s better to walk half way to school than not to walk at all, right?
Tasslen: Oh right, just like it’s better to have half a whoopie pie than none at all.
Yes.
Me: So, Tasslen, it looks like your Troop is going to visit a nursing home this week. Do you know what that is?
Tasslen: Yes, it’s like an orphanage for old people.
Tasslen was riling her brother at breakfast. Odin says “Taazzzz, what are you doing?!”
“I got your goat and am taking it around the barn for a walk.”
Tasslen: yeah and the pancakes are bigger than your head!
Odin: but not bigger than mom’s head. Hers is really wide.
Happy Mother’s Day all
#tasslenisms #odinisms
After Odin asks me repeatedly for a bath, I find out why.
Tasslen has convinced him that if his feet smell, mosquitoes will bite him.
Mom, did you know Einstein said you should be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn…Then you should always be a unicorn?
I did not know that
#tasslenisms #greatquotesofscience #sorrylothlorien
Kid discussion: who loves blue more? Odin: I love blue to the moon and back
Tasslen: Well, I love blue to the multi-verse and back pi times.
Um
Where’s the gnome?
Tasslen: I think he’s in the hostel
#tasslenisms #greenthumb #IThoughtItWasAHosta
Wow mom, I just saw that this computer would have cost a lot of money in the store, but we got it FREE from Santa!
Cool huh?
Um yes.
Fire outside tonight: So if you saw a kid with no clothes except what they were wearing, no toys, and their house was burned to the ground because their town was dangerous, and they didn’t speak your language… what would you do?
Tasslen: I would grab an iPhone or something and ask “how do you say ‘come live at my house’?
That’s the American way.
#backtobasics #onalighternote #wisdom #giveusyourhungry
January 28, 2017
At the dinner table: so Tasslen how do you like dinner?
Tasslen: don’t take offense, but… I mean, excuse me from the table!!
That bad, huh.
Tasslen surprises me this morning with: So with Trump, it’s going to be like he says, “don’t ask what you can do for your country, ask what your country can do for you!”
Oh my, a pundit already, and thank you grandma for history lessons 
I thought that was someone else. Are my eyes beeseeving me!?
And then, I saw an old newspaper from 2003, and everything back then was black and white! I was born in color though.
#TheMoreThingsChange
Tasslen: Mom, someone said “oh my God” at school today.
Me: Well, maybe that’s okay in their family.
Odin: I say “oh my gosh”
Tasslen: I say “omg”
Me: Where did you hear that “omg” anyway?
Odin: Pennsylvania
uh, ok
#tasslenisms #odinisms
Tasslen: if I were president, I would make sure there were no robbers, and I would make all the grocery stores free so no one is hungry.
Odin: I would walk around preschool and talk to everyone nice.
I’m down with this.
#tasslenisms #odinisms
While playing a game with the kids: Wow Odin, you are a natural at this.
Tasslen: Yeah Odin, and I’m super-natural.
Me: Odin, you’re so tired, why don’t you close your eyes for a little bit?
Odin: But I don’t know how!
Tasslen (exasperated): Odin you do too! You blink them all day long!
#tasslenisms #odinisms
Mom, since I’m late, bring me into the office or I’ll have to see the Truman Officer. #tasslenisms
TaglineTasslen: Odin, see it’s like this, “preschool: you play, you learn, you live.”
#tasslenisms #takesafterhermomma
Tasslen: I’m actually more than bi-lingual.
I know Bon jour French, English, Spanish, karate, and…well, I actually speak six languages if you count “dog.”
Me: It’s Stella’s birthday today, maybe we should get her a McDonalds hamburger as a treat?
Tasslen: No! No! McDonalds is so unhealthy, it has to be Five Guys.
#GirlLovesHerDog
Not sure I’m going to be thrilled with whatever explanation follows “But, all I did was….”
O: Mom! Mom! The Force, it waked up!
T: Mom, I love Phasma, even though she’s bad. Her outfit’s great!
#Odinisms #Tasslenisms #StarWarsWithKids
After unloading my gym bag shampoo, soap, etc, Tasslen says: A girl’s gotta have her ‘Toilet Trees!’
She cracks herself up on this one all the time. What a picture she paints.
While discussing the news: Don’t Trump to conclusions!
#pundit
Tasslen: Wow mom, two inches of snow coming today!
Me: How do you know?
I asked the Magic 8-Ball!
Jedis don’t pee their pants.
#randomblurt
So she says, “Mom, I want to make arrows, you know, with points, and shoot them at your back.
Happy Valentine’s Day!”
Tasslen helped me make appetizers with pastry dough.
While I was folding turnovers, she was making “imperial tacos.” Ok.
Me: what was that?
Response: I just farted a symphony! (Child shall remain nameless to protect the guilty
Tasslen and Odin have a new favorite called “the dog food game.”
It goes like this: put dog kibble on every surface in every room.
End of game.
#tasslenisms #odinisms
Playing Restaurant with Tasslen
Tasslen: So, there’s your food. Would you like anything that is not food with your breakfast?
Me: Sure, how about a newspaper?
Tasslen: We don’t have that, but you could have an electronics charger for all your devices.
Tasslen: Look what I drew Mom! Someone will think a one-legged dog landed here.
Tasslen to her 2-year old brother: Some day you’ll have superpowers like dad– you can eat raw cookie dough without getting sick, and pee standing up!
Ron to me while I’m plating dessert (and Tasslen is practically jumping on me): I don’t think Tasslen does too well on delayed gratification.
Tasslen: What is delayed Grab-ulication?
So it looks all fancy when you walk up the stairs, but really it’s Donald Trump’s prison.
#pundit
Odin on the papal visit: Look, it’s the white boy!
Tasslen on the state of my car: Mom, it smells terrible, like farts and rotten Ritz crackers.
Oh my.
#tasslenisms #odinisms
Reading a book about constellations at bedtime.
Me: … and your dad was born under the sign of Aries, it says people born then are bold.
Tasslen: Yes, that is true! He is bald!
Tasslen after watching a show about lightwaves and color: Can you imagine a world without color!?
What would happen to Ariel?
Glad she’s looking out for her people.
Tasslen: One day I’m going to be a real person landing on a real planet.
Tasslen: I touched a dead spider Me: Really, What was it like?
Tasslen: Deaddy Long Legs
The end of saying grace at the table. Odin (instead of ‘amen’) says: ODIN!!
Tasslen: He thinks he’s famous
Me: Sort of the ultimate in famous
Ron: Or ultimately historical
Tasslen: That’s right, ultimately hysterical!
#tasslenisms #odinisms
Grandma at cake time: I’ll have a thin sliver please.
Tasslen: that is the worst piece.
Tasslen: Mom! Mom! Odin just read his first word!
Me: What is it?
Tasslen: Loading
Tasslen on her new sneakers: These are great, they help me jump to my highest destiny.
Tasslen and Ron playing with building set: you had the hammer dad, but I nailed it.
Tasslen rushing at museum: C’mon mom, I’m hungry.
Me: Believe me, we are on the same page.
Tasslen: Well go faster, I’m on the next page already.
see also Tasslenisms One ♥ Tasslenisms Two ♥ Tasslenisms Three